Attempt to Enlarge Penis with Olive Oil Causes Man to lose his Genitals

A 50-year-old Thai man developed cancer in his genitals, after he injected himself with olive oil to enlarge his penis. He required emergency surgery to remove his genitals to stop cancer spreading. He had been injecting his penis with olive oil over a number of years and it had become infected which caused the cancer.
The un-named man had injected his penis with olive oil in a bid to make it bigger. The procedure is quite common in Thailand, other substances also used include; bees wax, silicone or even paraffin. There have been reports from one Bangkok hospital that they see up to 40 patients a month suffering from side-effects of this treatment.
The procedure is carried out in back-street clinics across the country and after the latest incident, health officials have rushed to reassure men that size isn’t everything.
Sirikul Jiraranaikhajorn, spokeswoman for the Police General Hospital in Bangkok said: “This is the biggest genital surgery we have ever done as we found cancer. “ She also warned other men away from the procedure; however she never mentioned that the practice actually caused cancer but that infections were common, from the use of backstreet clinics. She added: “It only brings bad results – people misunderstand [that is works]. A woman will love a man not because of the size.”

Russian Politician Found Encased in Concrete

The body of a missing Moscow city legislator has been found in a private garage basement on the out skirts of the city. The missing man Mikhail Pakhomov, 36, who was also a construction tycoon, was found inside a rusted metal barrel filled with concrete, according to police.
For many people this is something normally seen in the movies or TV cop shows however it is fairly common in Russia especially in the early 1990’s. On Sunday evening investigators removed the body and police stated that Pakhomov had been tortured. It is believed that he was killed over a $80 million loan.
It is no secret that many sectors of Russian politics is deeply corrupted, last year Mr. Putin’s chief of staff, Sergei B. Ivanov, called housing and utilities services one of Russia’s most corrupt sectors. There are large sums of money at stake and most of the lucrative contracts are doled out at a municipal level meaning it is pretty easy for corruption.
Mr. Pakhomov was a promising young star in United Russia, which rules Russia and was founded by President Vladimir V. Putin. He was head of a construction company and it has been reported that he had won large contracts to develop utilities and infrastructure in several cities.
There haven’t been many people to survive when they try to fight the corruption in Russia, in 2011 the mayor of Sergiyev Posad was gunned down in his driveway. It was a contract killing which investigators believed was most likely linked to his disputes with the city’s utility contractors.
An editorial by Gorod48, a news Web site in Lipetsk said: “A similar event has never happened with a V.I.P. in our city. Even in the ‘evil ’90s’ nobody disappeared: businessmen were killed right where they lived or worked, and bandits from competing groups shot or blew each other up wherever they happened to be.”

Largest Captive Crocodile Dies

A crocodile in the Philippines who was  officially the worlds largest captive croc and local celebrity has died, it has been reported. The massive one ton crocodile was the world’s largest saltwater crocodile and had become somewhat of a local celebrity, including getting a place in the Guinness book of world records.
There will be funeral rites held for the croc and then its body will be preserved and displayed in a local museum. The croc had brought a number of tourists to the obscure Philippine town Bunawan, and locals hope people will still come to see it when it is displayed in the museum.
The crocodile named Lolong, after a government environmental officer, was found on Sunday in a pond, flipped over with a bloated stomach. Wildlife experts started an autopsy on the creature on Monday, trying to determine cause of death.
Lolong measured 6.17 meters (20.24 feet) and was thought to be cause of a number of deaths of local villagers, until he was caught. It was estimated that he was around 50 years old. His name sake died from a heart attack after traveling to Bunawan to capture him. Since his capture Lolong captured the hearts of many locals and he also came to symbolize the rich bio-diversity of Agusan marsh where he was captured.
After his autopsy Lolong will have a tribal ritual performed which entails butchering chicken and pigs as funeral offerings to thank forest spirits for the fame and other blessings the crocodile has brought at the eco-tourism park where he became the star attraction.
Speaking about the said death of their beloved croc, Mayor Edwin Cox Elorde said: “The whole town, in fact the whole province, is mourning. My phones kept ringing because people wanted to say how affected they are.”
Officals were planning on constructing a road to the park where Lolong resided, to help cope with the growing number of tourists who were flocking to the eco-park. However Lolong will be displayed in a museum to help keep tourists coming to the area, Elorde stated.
He said: “I’d like them to see the crocodile that broke a world record and put our town on the map.”

News Is that Blackberry killing your sex life?

While many couples blame the advent of smart phones, tablets, Twitter, Facebook and the like for their failing love lives it seems that the tool often blamed is redeeming itself by becoming part of the solution too.
A new piece of research by the online pharmacy www.ukmedix.com has revealed that as a nation we could be turning to apps to help put the spice back into the bedroom. The researchers had noticed a spike in the number of sex advice apps downloaded in the first weeks of the year and so commissioned the research to ask a whole load of traditionally reserved Brits what was getting it up for them.
Over 1600 men and women took part in the survey and of them 42% said that they used the internet not only to choose their mother’s birthday present, but also what they might get up to with their partner once the bedroom door was shut.
So it’s not just young lads looking at stuff they might not even understand yet, adults are getting in on the net’s sex education offerings and bringing to life their pillow talk. People were using their downloaded apps for inspiration on positions (41%), techniques(35%) and bedroom games(33%).
Maybe the smart phone in the bedroom isn’t such a bad thing after all. Just be careful what you forward when you’re browsing the sex apps, pleasuring your lover and replying to your boss’s late night emails simultaneously.

Man’s Drunken Night Ends with a 10ft Snake in the Bed!

People can be forgiven, waking up the morning after the night before with someone in bed next to them, they normally wouldn’t have touched with a barge pole if it weren’t for beer goggles, However on man woke up with something rather more slippery than a dodgy shag, a 10ft Python! To make matters worse when he awoke the snake was making eyes to eat his mate, who was asleep on the sofa.
During a very drunken night out, Dwayne Matthews, decided in his infinite wisdom to buy an African rock python – called Bruce off a traveller, as you do. Unfortunately the next morning the python was looking for its next meal, which happened to be Matthews’s mate who was sound asleep. Luckily Matthews managed to throw a duvet over the python to subdue it.
Now that’s one snake most people wouldn’t want to wake up to.
African Rock snakes are the third largest in the world and they suffocate their victims in their coils before they swallow them hole, nice. Normally they go after large animals such as crocodiles or antelope; however a sleeping human would be considered an easy meal for one.
When Matthews subdued the snake, instead of calling the relevant authorities, he tried to sell the snake to a reptile shop. Unfortunately for Matthews, the reptile shop owner had been made aware of a local theft of snakes from a house so informed the police. After nearly seeing his mate swallowed by a snake, Dwayne was handed a suspended eight-week prison sentence after he had admitted handling stolen goods.
Speaking about the somewhat foolish events Dwayne’s Solicitor Richard Baker said:
“In his wisdom, and no doubt egged on by his inebriated friends, he decided it would be a good idea to buy it and sell it. The next morning he realised it hadn’t been such a good idea. He got up to find one of his friends asleep on the sofa and this snake rearing up at him in an S-shape, its jaws open like a cobra. Instead of running out of the house, as some would have done, and leaving his friend to his fate, he apprehended this snake. He ran upstairs, got a quilt and threw it over the snake to subdue it and put it in a tank. It was like a sub-plot from a Guy Ritchie film. He didn’t decide to get rid of it by dumping it in a bin, he was doing the best he could to remedy the situation.”
Swayne had to pay £85 costs and an £80 victim surcharge. The Magistrate described the incident: “This was a bit of a foolhardy enterprise.”